I don't think the sheer ignorance is what surprises me: It's the selfishness that makes me sick.

That's really sad. I have also read so many stories of young men committing suicide, thinking they MAY have aids.

I don't know how much it would cost to get an HIV test in India, but it would be still be not affordable by poor people.

If someone knows about any good organizations working in this field. Please let me know.I would be happy to donate.

Did she even stop to ponder where the baby got HIV in the first place? But then I suppose if that were the case, we'd have two deaths happen instead of one. Talk about a lose-lose situation.

Sandeep, it seems you're pointing to the mother. The baby was adopted so it wouldn't be 2 deaths instead of one.

Although what a sad situation. Ignorant idiots with license to birth unfortunate children, then with license to kill those unfortunate enough to depend on them for their life.

Oh I'm sorry. I missed the tiny "adopted". Damn my miserable attempts at speed-reading. =(

uneducated people who rely on words of the masses.. and this is what happens.. tragedy...

i worked in the slums of bangalore a few years ago, and you could palpate the uneducated choices, ignorance in people ravaging rampantly.... it was truly horrific...

aids tests are not that expensive... but the cheaper solution to a lot of the spread of the disease of course are condoms and protection... between 5-10 rupees at max... however young prostitutes are told not to use them since their customers don't like them.. and wives trust their men, and men trust their wives... a lot of spread of course is due to the truck drivers stopping around india on their treks.... a subset of folks that is spreading the disease like wildfire..

what will be the solution? education, awareness, and action...

Angie

It's the selfishness that makes me sick.

While I understand how you feel, sop and think for an instance, what kind of wretched existence will make a mother kill a baby.

She probably wa driven by two fears
1. That aids is incurable, and infectious
2. The medical cost of treating an HIV positive person is high enough to break the backs of well to do families, none of who seem to excape the "infectious" stigma even as everyone knows that infected blood/syringes are a common cause of protatcting the disease.

Someone I know is going through this horrible experience. He is HIV positive. His son's life was so bad (due to assumptions that people make)that they moved the son to a different city to have a chance at normal life

His wife, who works,(her large income is depleted as soon as it arrives) takes care of her husband, and has to bear the horrible knowledge her husband will never be cured. To add to this, her son is not with them either. He is growing up happy though. She is a doctor.

If life can be so hard for a doctor with this illness in the family, put the poor, ill informed mom, in perespective.

Her act, while still horrible, will evoke empathy rather than anger.

Sumitha,

I too know someone, who had go to through so much pain.Luckily the person was tested -ve.

But those 2-3 months when going for the tests and waiting for the results was really painful.

Rkay

yes, these things are heartbreaking.

To add to the story earlier, this was a marriage on the brink of a divorce (for very different reasons) so when the diagnosis came, the girl's parents told her it was a God sent opportunity to extricate herself.

She is a brilliant surgeon and said she could not, in all integrity, leave a husband, even if she had differences with him, at a low point in life. (Noone knows this- except some in the family)As a doctor, she felt she could combat things, most others couldnt.

It can be heartbreaking in many ways. (for the "victim" and those around them

Sumita

Yes, I do feel empathy: for THE BABY. My point was, I can understand the lack of education, and confusion, but the decesion, in the end, was based on selfishness. This was not a euthanasia, mercy type case. While I can feel sympathy for those mothers who suffer from post-partum depression, mental illnesses, etc., I can't feel badly for the mother and her "painstaking decesion" in this case. We don't have all the information here, but enough information for me to reasonably see various decesions that were made based on self-interest, correction selfishness.

With all do respect (cuz I do respect you Sumita), the case you gave, the mother moved her son for a chance at a better life. While the mother was educated in this case, let's not insult the devotion and integrity of mothers out there who are not educated, but would do ANYTHING, or at least the BEST they can for their children. And I believe this is not an idealistic viewpoint, as there are plenty of examples. The ability to give unconditional love is not restricted to those of us with multiple educational designations.

If she truly loved (unconditionally, in a universal sense) her adopted son, she would've surely looked for ANY way out (ie. a second opinion) before condemning the child to death! The article says the villagers only told her the baby "might" be suffering from AIDS. This is the strongest argument against her. Secondly, it's not as if she hasn't had children before, who have probably suffered through similar illnesses such as flus, etc; thus these minor symptoms the boy exhibited shouldn't have been so alarming, as to not want to wait it out, and get tested. Thirdly, her motives behind adopting a BOY are a bit suspicious... (Please let's not turn this into a post about why boys are favoured).

Angie

If she truly loved (unconditionally, in a universal sense) her adopted son, she would've surely looked for ANY way out (ie. a second opinion) before condemning the child to death

Totally agree there. However, to love, one has to be conscious. When people use the word love, mostly its in a utilitarian sense. As is borne out by the flippant attitude to relationships.

Its all related in this sense. Its very hard to assess another's capacity to love unless one has been tested oneself in situations where loving is a verb, an act of conscious action, rather than a response. anyoen can love when all is well. It is very hard to love when one is put to inconvenience.

We can only assess our own ability to love. Never another's. People's inability to love when in pain is the cause of most horror and tragedy.

Unfortunately, the ability to bear pain is called masochism in the modern world. We automatically avoid pain, rather than
1. Finding ways to prevent it
2. Finding ways to transcend it.

We all do it. The mother's case is an excessive one, that's all.The baby deserves all our empathy. The mother deserves it too.

Sumita

Angie

The ability to give unconditional love is not restricted to those of us with multiple educational designations.
.

Yes, you make beautifully true points. so the qwuestion becomes, what creates this difference in people?

Sumita

I WAS speaking of love as a response to difficult situations rather than a flighty, silly notion. I don't have any idealistic or romantic notions about it. I understand conscious decesion, subconcious decesion, masochism, utilitarianism, ism, ism, ism!! I still firmly believe that any mother who loved her child would not act in this manner.

Remember, this is not a fly-by night romance or relationship: this is a mother-child relationship. There are plenty of examples to cite, in my own life, and others of putting "it to the test" when "inconvenienced". Parents should never be inconvenienced by children THEY brought into the world.

I'm going to leave it at that. Let's see what the court decides, as only more information about the specific case can change my mind (maybe the mother is mentally ill from a trauma she suffered). Otherwise I will NEVER understand. Talking about what love is or isn't isn't going to make me revoke my viewpoint.

Angie

You are right. Your outrage is justified completely. (I respect that a lot,as evidently it comes from a high level of consciousness or else I would not engage in any discussion)

Your pain at the baby's death has the potential to blind you to the mom's pain.

This is the edge, we all find ourselves on, all of us, Its a thought, not a prescription

I am a mother Angie. Before I became one, I judged other women's(or people's) ability to love unconditionally. Now I watch, still feel pain,(and outrage) but the leap to blame, is slower. The effort to understand has taken frontstage.

sumita

Parents should never be inconvenienced by children THEY brought into the world.

Of course.Without a doubt

How many people have you met though, who consider
1. What inconveniences them
2.What having a child, let us say an incapacitated one means to them
3. How they will respond in unfortunate cinrcumstances
4.What is required to bring up a child
5. What is the role of a mother and father in parenting?
6.what is the role of marriage in parenting?

and many other such questions, before having a child?

Truly, not many. (of course, again, there are exceptions).

It may be an idealistic expectation. (I dont mean to say its not valid. I share that expectation with you)

Sumita

To come through this storm, Jesus is going to need Krishna and Rama's help. Education, education and education to the locals, for the locals, and BY the locals is what will change the senario. Then we will get the chance move on and ponder other horrible news.

a quick note about the title (and the first line):

they are both taken from the lyrics of a PJ Harvey song, "down by the water". i almost didn't use such words, b/c i was worried about giving the wrong impression, but then i decided to give all of you mutiny-lovin' readers more credit. i can't be the only one here who knows polly jean. ;)

I knew it sounded familiar.... from the Angeline record?

re: my above comment:

Never mind: it's from to bring you my love. That was a long time ago..........sigh....

It's pathetic that children have to suffer for the mistakes of their parents

I am so sorry to hear this. All of the Indian people I have known are people of GOD. She must have been filled with fear and greif and did not know what she had done. God will forgive her. I can only say I love the people of India who are true to God.