June 20, 2007
America's Got... Kashif, Hai HaiDance
America’s Got Talent is kind of the summer replacement for American Idol. For the most part it’s awkward amateurs getting “gonged” by the judges — with the occasional semi-professional dance/martial arts troupe showing up to keep the audience awake. (Oh, and Jerry Springer is in there, just basically being Jerry Springer.) Toward the end of last night’s episode, my jaw dropped when they put this guy on:
What’s your reaction to this? I don’t think it could be rated very highly as a specimen of Bollywood dance, though Kashif is pretty committed to those Hrithik-esque moves he’s doing. He seems very simple and pure; maybe that’s why the judges think he’s charming?
Unfortunately, the innocent-foreigner thing can only take you so far; I think Kashif should show up at the callbacks in Vegas with a flashy B-Boy outfit and a massive diamond necklace (courtesy of Jacob the Jeweler) that says KA$HIF. Otherwise, those shirtless pseudo-martial arts guys (tacky as they are) will eat him for breakfast.
amardeep on June 20, 2007 09:53 AM in Dance, Humor · T·r·a·c·k·b·a·c·k address · Direct link · Email post
Amardeep, what's going on? Have you too been dragged down into the morass of pop culture and desiana coverage? :)
kashif looks extremely indifferent - perhaps as amardeep, suggested, the right attire would have put him in the right mood? i think the judges were far more entertaining - the hoff looks glazed over.
Rahul, everyone needs comic relief!
Also, there's actually a fair amount going on here in terms of how desis are represented on American TV. Note the sitar music at the beginning... and the way they pan to his $10 shoes... And even the way the crowd and the judges react to him -- is it mockery or genuine enjoyment, or some mixture of the two? There's actually a lot to think about here, if we want to go that route. (Or it just might be comic relief)
Ah, he's just riding Sanjaya's coattails anyway...
Ah, that's more like it! :) Actually, I like these posts because I watch ZERO TV, so this is one of the few ways in which I can keep up.
Are you sure he wasn't drunk?
Who knows, may be he will be another Paul Potts from Britain Got Talent?
On the one hand I had to laugh at this, but I agree with Amardeep that there's a lot more going on here as far as how Kashif was represented, the background music chosen, the shot of his shoes(!?) etc. If we're talking purely on a talent basis then Kashif as sweet and pure as he may be was not very good to say the least, and his outfit did not match his performance at all - although he gets kudos for making the effort on TV! :)
The co-opting of South Asian culture is not a new trend - but surely the judges (and for that matter the studio audience) cannot be so naive as to think this is the best dance and/or representation of South Asians they've ever seen? Perhaps it is a combo of enjoyment and mockery ... I'd like to think more on the enjoyment side with some ignorance thrown in though.
p.s: this is my first foray into Sepia Mutiny - great job!
jerry springer is such an [expletive edited by SM Intern]. did you hear is comment during the dance?
That's just indicative of how *screwed* up this is, where Sanjaya even has coattails to ride.
The dude needs to get out more and see what other desis dance like. If he had a good network of friends they would be telling him how bad he is. So either he doesn't have friends or it is a media conspiracy to make us look bad.
I think America is ready for this. Bring on "the screwing of the light bulbs, the feeding of the chickens"! :)
Dude. My 15-year old cousin does a better Hrithik impression. He missed his calling!
So either he doesn't have friends or it is a media conspiracy to make us look bad.
He probably does have friends, and this is all just part of an elaborate gag...i.e. you go on national TV and make a complete fool of yourself, and dude, I will pay you, or let you sleep with my girlfriend.
Did somebody say bollywood & Hrithik?
I totally love the Investment Bank Analyst's outfit, crossed with Michael Jackson's 1986 loafers and tube-sock look. Hott. I didn't find Kashif committed to any of the choreography at all, however. Your face has choreography too, and if you're not selling what that body is doing, you may as well pack it up and go home. (or so I tell my performing troupe)
Plus he botched the butterfly step-- it's not a knee massage, yo. THe dance is easy as hell so that the performer can be freed up to get their thang on.
AK is right-- I think a good old fashioned sleeveless silver vest and some pleather pants, ala Hrithik, and a moussed, blow-dried coiff would really have put our boy in the right frame of mind to bring it!
My cousin called me last night and told me I had to watch this. He was funny. I was surprised at how impressed the judges were!
Agree with Shalu...I'm sure we all have aspiring Bollywood dancers in the family that could have tried out...had they known this is the kind of talent the show was looking for!
Kashif is the desi napolean dynamite. The audience loved dynamite and they loved Kashif for the same reason. Its fun to see someone them both get their groove on.
The look on Hasselhoff's face was priceless!
Noticed our friend is from Skokie, IL. I hope he gets around to performing Perky Little Porn Star eventually.
PS That surreal sequence brought to mind Omar from American Dreamz...
No offense but he sucked! The idea is novel, picking a bollywood song, but his performance was so BLAH!
I'm actually thrilled you posted this, because I only saw the preview to this guy before I had to run out. If you saw the rest of the show, they HAD to let this guy go through, considering the "Shakira-boy" drag act they passed before him. I agree with Dharma on the whole ignorance issue with the focus on his shoes, etc.
As far as the judges and their credibility go, they thought some little girl with a weak beatboxing act was the "greatest beatboxer they've ever seen" because she was able to sing at the same time while beatboxing. Hello, Rahzel anyone?
And now I'm fully embarrassed that I actually dissected this show.
As I coinidentally flipped to the end of this program last night, I casually remarked to my roommate, "I'll bet this will probably be mentioned on SM tomorrow..."
Thanks! We definitely need posts like this occasionally to maintain our sense of humour..
LOL #16. Well said. He is rather terrible though.
haha i loved the zoom in on his white socks.
But really, if all it takes is copying every one of Hrithik's steps to be on this show, I'm sure we could line up hundreds of dancers better than him!
I think he was ridiculous and the whole act played up to the stereotype of desis in the media being made to look dorky, ridiculous and pathetic. The audience reaction said it all.
I think the Americans have a soft spot for the geeky yet charming foreigner all the way from 'Sixteen Candles' Long Duck Dong's ''what's up,Hot Stuff?''
his dancing is entertaining?
america has really lost it.
I think you guys are being tough on the guy because he's a desi. He seems like a really nice and down-to-earth dude. The act was novel at least by American standards. They need the ratings too.
You're right, Shlok. Jerry Springer is such an [expletive edited by SM Intern]. In fact, I can't think of a bigger [expletive edited by SM Intern].
Kashif is either the most innocent guy on earth, or a diabolical India hating geek who has a single pointed agenda of bringing disgrace to Bollywood on the Big American Stage. LOL
Or it's possible that he knows he's not very good and he is trying to pull a William Hung.
Is it just me, or did anyone else notice him slide off into a Riverdance kind of thing towards the end?
I particularly loved how he looked *extremely* focused.
I thought it was pretty good. i don't like bollywood but what some call lack of enthusiasm by this guy almost seemed like a slacker pose.
this is kind of silly, but i noticed he said he "came down" to the u.s. about 6 years ago. it's one of those small but irritating things my cousins in india say in trying to sound american. if you go south, it's "come down." if you go north, it's "come up." go east or west, "come over."
i'm not trying to hate. i love my cousins, and they make plenty of fun of my kannada.
Chill #16 and Sadiappan #31 are right - it was desi dynamite and william hung all mashed up. Of course you realize this program is basically 'find the biggest freakshow' so kashif works too! His dancing was not great but his moves were freaky for American TV.
If he's extraordinary, imagine what a video of Hritik would do!
This dance could have stopped the Nazi march in Skokie, IL.
#16 - "I cooked you a delicious bass"
#26 - "Auto-mo-bile? Lake. Big Lake!"
# 37 - "I hate Illinois Nazis!"
Way to go Kashif!
Its a deliberate conspiracy by the US media to hunt out ethnic idiots and parade them on TV for audience gratification.
He's cool, and he's hip, and all you turdballs are just jealous!
Little Superstar would clean the floor with Kashif
http://youtube.com/watch?v=GLa6dzVN_AU
This is really catchy stuff, more so because he dispenses with the leather jacket and gear. I love the question about whether he had more moves. I think the West would be in awe of what Bollywood dance is capable -- if they only knew.
Did the accent make sense? We (in the office) suspect he's a 'plant.' Strategically placed tube socks over a bland outfit for TV, sandwich shop stint, and misplaced language, which didn't sit well with our H1B boys. For what Sanjaya brought in terms of ratings to AI, we've opened a pool to see how many episodes he'll stay on to bring the desi audiences and breathe new life into the show. First up in the poll is the play on words Muslim Kashif is America's Talent. We predict he'll be exposed as a Google executive, bored MBA kid, who wants to expose the show, or simply a good muslim boy gone wrong, who'll get smacked by mummy off air.
Is Kashif an earthy crunchy cereal killer?
all u indians are whining bcz he reppresented ur backward movie industry instead of being thankful to him even if he doesnt make it to the other rounds.... by the way hritihik is horrible at dancing... fag ass and a eunuch lol
to billy: lol ur soooo right ...my mom says the same thing about rithik that he could prolly be gay in the closet cz of his weird unmanly kind dancing
also he beatz ebert and roeper with his additional thum. lmao.
ur just jealous coz u r not gay. :P
put #37 and 39 together and you have a zionist conspiracy.
Hey Billy and Jill!
Do you mind if I call you Jilly since you both are the same homophobic troll? Thanks. You are banned. Take your stupidity elsewhere-- handle-switching, hate speech and trollery are unwanted here.
Great! All we needed was a Desi William Hung.
So, I have a taxonomical question based on #45? Can you be both a eunuch and a fag? What would that entail? "A friend" wants to know.
it would entail no tail.
Chill, comment 16, got it right. The only entertaining aspect of this guy's mediocre dancing was his obliviousness to how mediocre he is. It was entertaining in watching a real life Pakistani Nap. Dynamite who speaks like Pedro. I was laughing throughout the clip. But the guy was pretty lame.
I agree with Saira, Kashif looks like a complete plant. It's hard to believe someone can make such comical and cliched mistake when speaking English. "I am here to do the dance," sounds like someone imitating someone who does not speak English well. I mean who could possibly look that expressionless when dancing unless they were trying hard not to. Plus, those dance moves were pretty awful for him not to be faking.
I bet he is an ISI agent sent to destroy bollywood's image!
[i]Filmiholic on June 20, 2007 04:27 PM ยท Direct link
Is it just me, or did anyone else notice him slide off into a Riverdance kind of thing towards the end?[/i]
It was Kashif sliding off into Flapdance.
I wonder which dance he'll attempt the next time? LOL, loved the way he said, 'Different dance for different song', like they were all his creations.
that's it! he's part of SpoorLam's saffronist brigade, sent to destroy the global enthusiasm for bollywood, as it tears down humare desh ki parumpurah and leads innocent girls astray. Like myself.
Kids, say No to Bollywood.
Is that why the Pope says...that the devil is in the de-tails?
DesiDancer your Hindi rocks!
Saira:
Your office sounds like a great place to work. What's the dog's opinion on the dance?
Manju:
Are you going to let DesiDancer get away with #14??
As long as we're going to have dorky desis, I much preferred Mr. West Punjab: http://youtube.com/watch?v=-aRpeSw4bfw
This has to be a joke. First of all, Kashif is 23, and he said he's been in America for 6 years, which would mean he came when he was 17, so I'd imagine his English would be a lot better. Second, do you think he would really look that "fresh off the boat" after coming to America at a young age? Third, sandwich shop manager???
Yes, I know the funny foreigner thing helps raise ratings, but I'm really annoyed by the William Hungness of the whole thing. Kashif wouldn't be nearly as entertaining if he did the same dance but spoke with a Midwestern accent and wore Abercrombie clothes.
However, there's a positive thing about this. He's actually an innocent-looking Muslim on TV that isn't an extremist or a fundamentalist!
1. Cringe-worthy television
2. There are Pakis in Skokie?
3. The Hoff was clearly enamored.
Kashif is the desi napolean dynamite
Because that does explain why the audience loved him. There was something sweetly endearing about him. But it doesn't explain the judges' comments on how talented and unique he was, because it was very mediocre stuff. I've seen a dozen uncles with better moves at parties.
Anyway, the thing that really stood out for me is that the audience laughed as soon as he spoke! Did anyone else notice this? What was so funny?
1) his name?
2) his accent?
What's so comedic about either of those things?
He's the brown William Hung. You know because apart from C++ and being doctors we Asians and Indians are these bucktoothed nerds and Bollywood geeks.
i hear you Legionary Pullo. and normally i'd let these artistic types-- who depend so much on us bourgeois financiers, without whom they'd still be stuck on the farm wondering about paris--have it in no uncertain terms, especially since they find our existence grotesque and incomprehensible, despite the fact that we assuage poverty...which is of course something they don't talk about during their tea parties in Cambridge.
but i withheld because desidancer has it right. Kashif's dorky immigrant shtick combined with the obvious michael jackson reference is clearly a subversive statement aimed at warning america that what seems so innocent is really very dangerous. jackson is the personification of america's problematic race relations and the ibanking wardrobe of the analyst class is menat to warn america that the formally colonized have finally shed their fabian blinders and realized the path to true power lies in the creative destruction of american-style capitalism.
like bollywood, kashif has chosen pop culture to expose this trojan horse, so only someone schooled in the high and low, like desidancer or camille paglia, can get it.
much respect to DD.
A fan club in the making !!! Come and see.
Its a, Napoleon Dynamite, trip... Perfect way to mock the brown community. Doesn't this guy have friends that could have told him that his dancing sucked and that his only chances are in commedy?
that sort makes me feel like puking
here is the original:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Reozxo-WL4c
As a male Indian dancer, I wish there was someone more competent representing our creed...perhaps something more along the lines of [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqqP9RvkyKc]this[/url]
in principle i am glad to see someone doing this in the contest. but hrithik roshan he ain't. kashif needs to spend a lot time in the gym and in dance class to make this "talent" work. too bad for america they are not getting a really great example of filmi dance and will have no idea how really fabulous it can be when performed by the right people.
Lol, I love how you people are saying everyone in your family or your friends can dance better than him. In reality you're all just upset because Kashif, a Pakistani was the one who had the courage to go up on stage and a actually perform and compete for a million dollars. While all you guys can do is sit at home and watch him.
Bunch of loonies u are...academic..self-obsessed cupcakes. Whether he's a plant, is for real or fell out of the sky, what does it matter. The guy has pulled off what he did and try and appreciate the entertainment value, rather than dissecting the issue with toothpicks. As for media trying to paint desis in poor light, guess what. any publicity is eventually good publicity and people will start loving the garish act that bollywood is.
Kashif got his 15 min. of fame and 3:35 min. of free air-time to advertise his now world famous sandwich shop. Next time you see Kashif, you know you'll go in and ask for an autograph and to see a little of that knee massagin' action. Kashif is da man, don't be hatin'.